Entire nation definitely to blame for its hooligans

PEOPLE who fight at football matches represent the attitudes and values of their entire nation, it has been confirmed.

Following violent clashes with Russian fans, the English media confirmed that the country as a whole should be judged on the actions of its most violent knobheads.

Tabloid journalist Roy Hobbs said: “These Russians turn up at the football, an innocent game played for entertainment purposes, and start smashing things and hitting people. This is historically unprecedented behaviour.

“They called themselves ‘hooligans’ – a Russian word that means ‘fearless warrior bear’.

“What sort of race would indulge in such savagery? Any nation whose young men fight at sporting events must be irredeemably savage and corrupt.

“Clearly they are some primitive warlike civilisation, genetically inferior to peace-loving lands like ours and probably we should have a war with them.

“There’s no way anyone in Russia could possibly disagree with their actions or think that they are dicks.”