Horoscopes

Your astrological week ahead, with Psychic Bob

Leo (23 JUL-22 AUG) Give a man a fish and it will totally confuse him. Especially if you're in a nightclub.

Your astrological week ahead, with Psychic Bob

Taurus (20 APRIL - 20 MAY) Looks like summer is over. For you anyway, unless your appeal comes through.

Your astrological week ahead, with Psychic Bob

Leo (23 JUL-22 AUG) The longest journey starts with a single step. And the shortest one. All journeys, in fact. Not sure where I'm going with this.

Your astrological week ahead, with Psychic Bob

Taurus (20 APRIL - 20 MAY) If you really think you're your own worst critic, just ask any person you know to give their honest opinion of you.

Your astrological week ahead, with Psychic Bob

Taurus (20 APRIL - 20 MAY) On Sunday you rehearse for putting flea drops on your cat by trying to apply oil to the teeth of a working chainsaw.

Your astrological week ahead, with Psychic Bob

Leo (23 JUL-22 AUG) That dramatic music in your head, between buying a can of beer and opening it? That's not a good sign.

Your astrological week ahead, with Psychic Bob

Taurus (20 APRIL - 20 MAY) After watching BBC News 24 for three days straight you concede they're not going to report on that weird pork scratching you sent them.

Your astrological week ahead, with Psychic Bob

Leo (23 JUL-22 AUG) Tomorrow, you borrow the Pitbull album out of the library. Just to stop anyone else doing it.