Wales ‘carrying the rest of the UK’

THE victorious British Lions with ten Welsh players is being hailed as proof that Wales is running the UK.

The flag is suitably intimidating

The flag is suitably intimidating

Welsh domination extends beyond sport – sales of albums by Charlotte Church, Tom Jones and The Stereophonics represent 90% of all UK exports.

The success of Welsh comedians like Rhod Gilbert means that three out of four times a British person laughs, it is at something a Welshman said.

Additionally leek soup, stew and cheese on toast have been hailed by scientists as the three most nutritious meals.

Welshman Roy Hobbs said: “It’s not that we Welsh are anti-English – my friends and I all own holiday cottages there.

“We even have our children learn English – it’s nice they keep alive their quaint language with its curious excess of vowels, for heritage’s sake.

“The weather’s rubbish in England and the people are surly, grey-faced, spacewasters but we like it when they dress up in traditional costumes and clack sticks together to entertain us.”

Englishman Nathan Muir said: “We’re fed up of being patronised by the Welsh – stereotyped as a bunch of Morris Dancing bulldogshaggers.

“And what about Andy Murray?”

However Hobbs said: “At the end of the day Murray is British, and for me, that makes him an honorary Welshman.”