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Trump agrees deal for demineralisation of Ukraine

PRESIDENT Trump has settled on a deal that will see Ukraine freed from the scourge of lithium that has blighted the country for too long.

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Nigel Farage volunteers for role as scheming, cheating quartermaster

NIGEL Farage has volunteered to be, in times of war, the head Army quartermaster diverting vital supplies for his own personal profit. 

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