Relationships

Putting condoms on bananas: what passed for sex ed in the 80s and 90s

SEX education in the 80s and 90s was a mystifying process that left you more clueless than you started. Here were your school's supposedly helpful attempts to teach you the facts of life.

Find the least sticky table: your guide to a romantic date in Wetherspoons

WANT to impress your date with a visit to the country's most romantic food and drink establishment? Make sure you do these things.

Woman's world rocked by three minutes of missionary position, boyfriend confirms

A MAN has performed mind-blowing sex on his girlfriend by doing three minutes of missionary intercourse, he has confirmed.

'You're great company' and other phrases that mean you're not getting a second date

WONDERING if you repulsed your date with your face and personality? If you hear any of these phrases, the answer is 'yes'.

Your boring friend's guide to why monogamy is great

IS your dull mate settled down with the first woman who’ll shag him regularly - and claims it’s fantastic and won’t shut up about it? Here's Tom Logan's tedious guide to having found ‘the one’.

Why sexually charged love-hate relationships are bollocks in real life

IN films, when two hot people hate each other, they often realise they’ve been in love all along! So why does this bullshit scenario occur so rarely in real life? 

The subjects you never listen to your partner's opinion about

OCCASIONALLY your partner’s opinion is welcome. In some rare instances, it’s even ‘asked for’. But when it comes to certain topics, there’s not a chance in hell you’ll ever listen. Take these, for example.

How to treat a job interview like a first date and vice versa

INTERVIEWS are much like dates: you put a shitload of work and afterwards they disappear and refuse to answer messages. Use these tactics for both.

Boyfriend definitely not sulking

YOUR boyfriend is definitely not sulking and it is definitely nothing to do with the football, he has confirmed.

How to use up your friends' sympathy for being dumped in record time

GETTING dumped is shit, but almost as shit for the poor friends who are obliged to be there for you afterwards. Here’s how to make them lose the will to live.