Relationships

A SICKENING couple who have never improved themselves in any way are in a committed, loving relationship.

EXPRESSING your desire to take things up a notch in the bedroom when you’re wide awake with faith in your libido and/or dick is only the first step.

A WOMAN who luxuriates in clean towels, fresh linen and delicately scented candles is desperate to live with her foul, belching pig of a boyfriend.

A GIRLFRIEND’S anecdote needs to be simplified so that her boyfriend can follow it while looking at his phone, it has emerged.

MEN cannot express affection towards other men and even choosing between a ‘mate’, a ‘dude’ or even a ‘fella’ is a minefield. Use this ranking to guide you.

A WOMAN who split up with her boyfriend last month is confident she can still ask him for help moving, to fix her internet and other household tasks.

A MAN who was first to ejaculate during a threesome struggled to occupy himself profitably thereafter, he has admitted.

BEING ‘best friends’ with your partner can damage your sex life, according to a sex therapist. If that sounds like you, here’s how to end that passion-killing friendship.

A MAN sick of the misogynistic carousel of online dating is ready to settle down with a serious, long-term casual hook up, he has announced.

A WOMAN confident her relationship is superior to others is technically correct, but only because every other couple she knows is a car crash.