Lifestyle

Five shit things you didn’t expect would happen in your 40s

DID you stupidly think you’d be happy and sorted by the time you got to middle age? Here are some unpleasant realities you weren’t expecting.

Smug couple with smug baby live in smug house with smug garden

AN unbearably smug couple have imbued smugness into every aspect of their lives, it has emerged.

Five batshit things to wake up in the night and worry about

SLEEPING a bit too well at the moment? Here are five mad and pointless questions that are sure to keep you up all night.

How to be a WhatsApp dickhead

RESEARCH shows that most adults now spend 100 per cent of their day titting about on WhatsApp. Here’s how to make sure you’re a real dick about it.

M&S lingerie range implies M&S shoppers have sex

SHOPPERS at M&S are affronted by a new range of lingerie that implies they are the kind of people who have sex.

Why renting is better than buying, by parents who don't want to give you a deposit

THINKING of taking your first step on the property ladder but need help with the deposit? Tight-fisted parent Mary Fisher explains why it’s actually better if you keep renting.

The hot facial hair styles that will look bloody awful on you

SEEN a picture of a dude with fancy facial hair and decided you could look just as hot after some nifty razor action?

Woman obtains superinjunction against photos of her with a fringe

A WOMAN has obtained a court-ordered superinjunction to prevent the publication of any photos that show her with a fringe.

'Hiya!' and five other unbearable ways to greet someone

SEEN an old friend in the street? Spotted your cousin at the bus stop? Here’s six ways to alienate them from the get-go.

'3am in the morning' and other turns of phrase that make you clench your fists

EVER get the red mist just because someone – perhaps even someone you love – has used a phrase that seems a legitimate reason to kill? Like these?

Women commit to rewilding 75 per cent of their leg hair

THE women of the UK have pledged to restore the natural ecosystem of their legs this winter.

Five items you already regret buying on Amazon Prime Day

BRITONS have eagerly been buying unnecessary tat in the Amazon Prime sale. But which useless purchases are you going to regret most when you can’t afford food in a week's time?