CRAMMED tube trains. Five-hour daily commutes. Soaring house prices. Jobs that barely pay a living wage. If London cannot return to this, the UK is doomed.
A WOMAN who liberally peppers her work emails with exclamation marks is just as powerfully irritating in real life, colleagues.
CHILDREN have been asked to please, God, chill the f**k out about dinosaurs.
THESE cats live on your street and aren’t busy, so it’s an absolute joke that they’re not into you giving them a little scratch. Ranked in order of selfishness.
TEACHERS have announced that they would be willing to relocate schools to pubs as a compromise to keep both open.
THESE are desperate times, and so Wetherspoons, restaturant to the top echelon of society, has opened its doors to the hoi polloi.
WORKERS in a socially distanced office have declared it to be absolutely marvellous and the way offices always should have been.
MET up with family? Your niece – who’s 17 for God’s sake – already developed in ways you never will? Here’s how to curb your boob envy.
A FEMALE scientist who discovered a coronavirus vaccine in March has given up trying to tell her male colleagues.
THE end of the Argos catalogue is the end of an era for Britain. Here’s why buying the same crap from Amazon will never feel as good.
AGREED to do someone a favour and now deeply regretting it? Here are some little helping hands you'll hate every minute of.
A RISE in Covid-19 cases has forced Greater Manchester to raise its alert level from well bad to fookin’ ‘angin’.
THE government’s half-price meal scheme begins today, but is it bollocks? Here's why you may not be rushing to take up Rishi Sunak’s incredibly generous offer.
JUST because you’re a nice middle class person it doesn’t mean you can’t talk dirty in the bedroom. Here sex columnist Donna Sheridan shares her tips.
YOU’VE been ordered back to ‘the office’. So what is this strange place, and why are you here?
A WOMAN who made a corner of her flat appear minimalist and sleek for the purpose of video calls is starting to believe her own lies.
A WOMAN has joked that she only becomes likeable after her morning coffee, to the surprise of colleagues who hate her at all times of day.
A RENOWNED female scientist has made it her life’s work to establish the precise timings of ‘Prosecco o’clock’ and ‘Gin o’clock’.
GLAMPING is just camping with a wood-burning stove and a string of fairy lights, new research has found.
LAST YEAR, I was a wreck. Overweight, ugly, deeply in debt, trapped in an unhappy marriage and playing Russian roulette every Saturday night just to feel alive.