Work

We're not mentioning salary because we know you're above that, says job advert

EMPLOYERS advertising for new staff have confirmed they do not post salaries because prospective employees are beyond such petty considerations.

Self-employed, independent consultant and other LinkedIn terms for unemployed

NOBODY on LinkedIn can stop congratulating each other long enough to admit they’re drawing dole. Use these phrases to cover up being between ‘great career opportunities’.

Six signs your WhatsApp group will shortly get you fired

AS Labour MP Andrew Gwynne discovered, every WhatsApp group is a ticking time bomb of kompromat. Here’s how yours will lead to your eventual dismissal.

Homeworker recalled to office doing piss-all to prove point

A HOMEWORKER ordered back to the office is spending long lazy days doing nothing to prove her point.

Six low-level bosses who wield their tiny amount of authority over you like fascist dictators

POWERLESS in their real lives, these wankers find their satisfaction in running a workplace like a Panzer Division. Which ones have bollocked you?

Are you becoming a distraction who must resign from your job? Take our quiz

ARE you doing your job perfectly, breaking neither rules nor codes, but should resign anyway because you are becoming a distraction like Tulip Siddiq? Find out.

Woman guessing her way through tax return definitely going to prison

A LENGTHY prison sentence is expected for a self-employed woman who had the audacity to believe she could complete her tax return without breaking the law.

Boss suddenly cool with working from home

A BOSS who is firmly against homeworking and demands all his employees attend the office in person is fine with it today.

"I'm at work, you f**kers"

HAVING a good time? Sat on your sofas, stuffing your faces, watching Saturday Kitchen? Christ I hate you. I’m at work.

Hot desking, and other workplace initiatives to guarantee a hostile environment

MODERN jobs like to advertise perks to improve your wellbeing at work. But while they're appealing in theory, you'll soon start to feel it's oppression of the workers.