Work

'Actioning', and other bullshit office jargon you hate

WORK in an office? Surrounded by wankers desperate to make themselves sound important? Then you’ll be sick of these irritating terms:

Homeworkers with kids begin six weeks of living hell

HOMEWORKERS with children begin six weeks of an endlessly harried logistical f**king nightmare today, they have confirmed.

Psychological tests, a 8,000-word essay and your first-born child: what job interviews demand these days

A CHRONIC labour shortage hasn’t stopped the audacity of prospective employers. Here’s what they now demand.

The middle-aged guide to fitting in with Gen Z work colleagues

IS everyone else on the video call younger and cooler than you? Did they not get your ‘computer says no’ gag? Hide your true age with these tips.

How to erroneously believe you're the best boss any employee could ever ask for

YOU care so much about your employees, you even call them at home at weekends. A management expert explains how to make your business your family.

Woman too sweaty to remove jacket

A WOMAN is bitterly regretting her decision to wear a blazer to work on one of the muggiest days of the year.

How much should you be paid? A gammon decides

WITH the biggest rail strike for 30 years underway, what should train drivers be paid? 58-year-old Roy Hobbs of Swindon, who knows f**k all, decides.

Graphic designers, and other careers your mum erroneously thinks make shitloads

DOES your mum believe she knows of a career option that would make you rich? She has no idea that these five jobs are just as badly paid as yours.

How to get your boss to agree to whatever you want

IS your boss being a dick about giving you a payrise while moving you to a three-day week? Get around their spurious objections.

Flight attendants and other professions that smile while they hate you

AIRLINE staff maintain a warm smile even for hen parties on gin who need a piss during take-off. These careers pay you for kindness to arseholes.