Work

Young people off work sick because they've discovered it's an option

Six wankers who always pipe up when the meeting reaches Any Other Business

READY for this tedious, pointless meeting to end, so you can get the f**k out of there? Not so fast, these six arseholes will always have something to add.

What you do for a living versus what your mum tells people you do

YOU’VE got an important and interesting job which your mum can’t get her head round. Here’s what you actually do, compared to what she tells people you do.

The five monotonous stages of Monday morning office chat

ONCE again it is Monday, as if you were not already well aware, and you must run the torturous gamut of post-weekend office chat. It will go like this.

Woman wrongly believes office flirtation will survive moving six desks away

A WOMAN who has been engaged in a long-term flirtation with a colleague mistakenly believes it will continue despite her moving 24 feet away.

Man eating lunch at desk to show off

A COLLEAGUE is eating lunch at his desk for the sole purpose of making everyone he works with look bad, he has confirmed.

Office 'best wishes' card signed by five million people

POLICE are trying to trace the recipient of a card signed by an estimated 5,000,000 workers across the UK.

Conniving office bastards have already stolen the best holiday dates

THREE weeks into 2024 all the best holiday dates have already been booked up by the scheming bastards you work with, it has emerged.

'I didn't know you existed': How to avoid getting your colleagues anything from the shops

YOU need something from the shops, but you’re surrounded by hungry, bored colleagues waiting to put in detailed requests. Here’s how to avoid being their pack mule.

Necessary to put on little show when late

EXPERTS have confirmed it is necessary to put on a little show when arriving late for work.