Work

A TEENAGER in her first job was shocked to be remunerated for her efforts, having assumed it was part of a grand scheme to make her life miserable.

YOUR lunch break is a golden hour of freedom from a long day as a corporate drone, except when the wankers you work with take it from you.

A WOMAN has decided to have children so she can breeze in and out of work whenever she wants, no questions asked.

A THIRD of the UK’s homeworkers plan to do their jobs from a rain-lashed beach during severe gales in Britain this summer.

EVERY employee in Britain is whistling and smiling until their thunder-faced bosses stalk past, it has emerged.

A MAN working a standard nine-to-five office job is finding it almost impossible to find the right ratio of working to doing f**k all.

A BUILDER working on a couple’s loft conversion has surpassed their expectations of him being an uncultured, bigoted wanker with zero professionalism.

OBNOXIOUS knobheads in your office have announced a programme of mandatory football enjoyment to accompany Euro 2024.

A JUDGE has ruled that saying ‘back in your day’ to an older colleague could be considered age harassment. Here are some phrases young people had better not say to you, then.

A WOMAN mistakenly believes that she could make a fortune on OnlyFans if she were to compromise her morals enough to sign up.