Politics
Government commits £49 to tent for the homeless
THE government has unveiled plans to eradicate homelessness by buying a tent from Millets.
Poem about Jeremy Corbyn may be shittest thing ever
A WOMAN’S poem praising Jeremy Corbyn may be the most horrendous thing ever to exist.
Terrified middle Englanders 'would vote for Pol Pot over Jeremy Corbyn if they thought it would protect their house prices'
MOST middle Englanders are so terrified of Jeremy Corbyn they would happily vote for Cambodian despot Pol Pot, it has been confirmed.
Why doesn't the ignorant, dickhead, extremist British public like us? ask centrist politicians
MODERATE UK politicians are bewildered that the clueless, moronic, and bigoted general public, especially those in the godforsaken North, do not support them and their careers.
Johnson and Rees-Mogg still not helping to pick all the fruit
BREXITERS Boris Johnson and Jacob Rees-Mogg are still not helping to pick fruit despite being directly responsible for a chronic shortfall in seasonal farm workers.
Guilt-ridden Brexit bus in self-destructive shame spiral
THE bus used to claim that Brexit would save £350 million a week is caught in a 'self-destructive spiral of shame'.
Jeremy Corbyn's guide to acting decisively
HELLO, comrades. As a top politician I know only too well the importance of acting swiftly and decisively. Here’s how to take the bull by the horns in a variety of real-life situations.
Doddery old f*ckers to form Brexit Home Guard
AGEING Leave voters are forming a Dad’s Army-style militia to defend Britain during the dark days of a no-deal Brexit.
- University fresher still believes in Corbyn's Brexit 'long game'
- Dominic Raab stockpiling food for himself
- Second EU referendum to include 'Are you an idiot?' question
- He doesn't even remember who I am, says sobbing Farage
- Danny Dyer appointed Minister for Not Getting Mugged Right off like a Right Little Mug
