What Boris Johnson can't do now he's got a CCJ: an unemployed debtor explains

BORIS Johnson has got a county court judgement against him for an unpaid debt, same as I have. Here is my guide to some of the things it will stop him doing:

Should we just get Blair back? asks Labour

THE Labour party is wondering if it should not just cut to the chase and reappoint Tony Blair as leader.

Freeports to allow sexual harassment, homophobic jokes and casual racism

BORIS Johnson has promised freeports will level up the economy and let Britons to dump all that politically correct nonsense to go back to the 70s.

Queen rocks up in comfies for scaled-back speech

HER Majesty The Queen will open Parliament today wearing joggers and a hoodie in line with Covid restrictions, it has been confirmed.

Have you been appointed to the shadow cabinet? Take our quiz

AFTER Keir Starmer’s busy weekend rearranging deckchairs, it’s hard to know who’s who in the shadow cabinet and if you’re shadow secretary for transport.

Think of it not as losing Scotland but as gaining a permanent Conservative majority, Nicola tells Boris

NICOLA Sturgeon has told Boris Johnson to think of an independence referendum not as losing Scotland but as the Tories ruling unchallenged forever.

Stabbing a fork into your thigh, and other activities more gratifying than being left-wing in Britain

ARE you broadly left-wing? Does British politics cause you indescribable pain? Here are five things more gratifying than the same miserable election results year after year.

Sadiq Khan's re-election a disaster for London, agree Doncaster, Hereford, Wrexham and Stroud

VOTERS from around the UK have agreed that Sadiq Khan should never have been re-elected as Mayor of London.

Labour Party to call it a day

THE Labour Party has announced it is to be formally wound up after losing the Hartlepool by-election. 

Believing the Earth is 6,000 years old an advantage: The DUP's advert for a new leader

THE DUP are looking for a new leader with the right blend of political acumen and batshit personal beliefs. Could you do the job? Read their recruitment ad: