BRITONS are nervously awaiting the all-clear from the prime minister’s doctors so that they can think he is a dick again.
YEAH. Thanks for electing me leader and everything, but is it okay if I’ve changed my mind? Because if I’m honest I want f**k all to do with this mess.
HI. I’m Rishi Sunak and I won’t leave you behind. If somehow you’re still struggling to get by on Britain’s prompt and generous Universal Credit system, here’s how to pay your way.
THE prime minister is leading the nation by setting a f**king terrible example showing them what not to do, Downing Street has claimed.
THE prime minister has thanked Britain for clapping to show they do not blame him in the slightest for the current crisis.
AS prime minister, let me say I am bloody pissed off. This was meant to be my year. Here’s what you as Britons can do to not upset me further.
DURING the budget you may have noticed that Tory spending is fine but Labour's was not. Here Tory MP Denys Finch Hatton explains why.
WOULD you like to win a date with the UK’s popular home secretary Priti Patel? Enter our unique competition for charity by answering these Priti-related questions.
RESTRICTIONS on migrant workers could free up jobs for unemployed Leave voters. Here are some of the exciting opportunities on offer.