Politics
THE same old twats who sullied the last few Conservative leadership races are once again entering this one.
KEIR Starmer has announced the whip has been suspended from an eighth MP for the crime of placing a cup on a wooden table without using a coaster.
THE King’s speech to parliament is the first chance for Britain to find out what they voted for three weeks ago, they have confirmed.
STARMER’S Labour have been in power for almost a week, and yet Britain still suffers from myriad problems. Which one has lost him your vote?
AS well as clocking off at 6pm on Fridays, Keir Starmer has announced he will take hourly fag breaks in the garden of Downing Street.
NOW he is no longer the MP for Stoke-on-Trent North, former teacher and monkey Jonathan Gullis has confirmed he will return to his zoological career.