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Politics

You to be prime minister soon at this rate

THE current churn rate of prime ministers means that you will be given a go in Downing Street before too long.

Silence from nation as Starmer demands he be told exactly what he did wrong

THE prime minister is standing at his Downing Street podium waiting to be told exactly what he did to deserve to be deposed, to shuffling silence.

Pies for breakfast: life under Burnham's Northern dictatorship

THE bourgeois Southern regime has fallen. In its place stands the People's Democratic Republic of the North, under the leadership of Comrade Burnham. Here’s what to expect.

Never mind, you can put up some more f**king flags

Generous Burnham offers Starmer choice of deaths

Now I am become death, the destroyer of worlds, says Burnham

ANDY Burnham has celebrated his election win by quoting the grim words uttered by J Robert Oppenheimer.

Public warned they are in serious danger of damaging Reform's narrative

THE British public has been warned if they continue to vote so irresponsibly Reform’s entire election-winning narrative could be at risk.

Ed Miliband, and other dull Labour twats the press is trying to make terrifying

THE right-wing press is desperate to convince readers that voting Labour will lead to a socialist nightmare ruled by ruthless Leninists. Here’s who it’s not really working with.

You know, Reform aren't such bad guys, Starmer tells voters

KEIR Starmer has told the people of Makerfield that Reform are not the unelectable monsters they have been led to believe.

If you could maybe specify the threats, Army told