Society

THE sight of a town’s Christmas lights going up is a terrifying glimpse of the nightmarish festivity on its way.

IT’S the hypocrisy I hate. We’ve all done crazy shit for kicks in late middle-age. But suddenly it’s only me who fakes being an admiral on Remembrance Sunday.

SO ethnic minority NHS staff doing home visits are intimidated by my flags? I don’t get it. Why be scared of a flag that just means you like England and nothing else?

A TEENAGER has forced society to reflect on its shortcomings and hypocrisies by wearing a keffiyeh neck scarf.

THE English curriculum is to be changed to remove double Latin with Michael Gove to instead reflect the realities of the 21st century. These are the new subjects.

A NEW survey has found that despite their reputation for cuddly chat and homespun wisdom, the majority of those aged 60 or over are glum, boring moaners.

RESIDENTS of Norfolk are delighted their county has been chosen as the location where a disgraced sex case is to live out his miserable, banished life.

THE nation’s Andrews have asked King Charles if he could also change his brother’s first name to avoid the association.

CARE home workers are struggling to decorate their premises for Halloween without reminding residents of their imminent demise, it has emerged.