Society

Plenty of affordable homes over here, say Britain's shitholes

THE UK’s least desirable towns and regions have a wealth of affordable housing just waiting for homeowners with low standards.

'He gets a free castle now': Sadistic things to tell gammons who hate Sadiq Khan

LONDON mayor Sadiq Khan has been knighted, prompting outrage from gammons. Since they’re utterly obsessed with him, here’s what to sadistically tell them…

Porn, and six other reasons world fertility rates are declining

WORLD fertility rates are declining across developed countries, and the universal availability of free internet pornography is to blame. Among other reasons.

Six guests you've invited to your wedding from sheer obligation

GETTING married? The list of twats you do not want to invite but must grows longer by the day. You will be paying £135 per head for these wankers.

Free school meals stigma to be extended into adulthood

THE disgrace of having received free school meals is to be extended until the age of 35 by making recipients wear badges.

Teenage boy watching lots of Pride Month-appropriate content

A TEENAGE boy is up in his room furiously streaming content that reflects the values of Pride Month.

Six other conspiracy theories that prove it wasn't a white man who did it

THE Liverpool parade crash suspect is in court today while rumours continue to swirl online that the real culprit was not a white man. As in these cases.

My day living my fantasy of being a PCSO, by Robert Jenrick

I’VE always dreamt of being a police community support officer, so I jumped at the chance to confront the worst type of criminal scum threatening our society: fare dodgers.