Queen 'just so f**king woke'

THE Queen is the wokest, most politically correct person in the entire British Isles, it has emerged.

'Does exactly what it says on the tin' and other ad slogans tedious pricks repeat

SOME advertising slogans were amusing the first time you heard them. But the humour soon wore off after years of bellends grimly parroting them. Groan once more at these:

Was Winston Churchill the 20th century's greatest racist?

IN an odd move, the Winston Churchill Memorial Trust has dropped his first name because of his unacceptable views on race. But was he the greatest racist of his era? We investigate:  

The fable of The Ant and the Grasshopper - updated for 2021

AS debate rages about who should pay for vital services, what better time to revisit Aesop’s classic fable about insect workers and freeloaders?

Boomers declare victory

BOOMERS have declared a final, crushing victory over Generation X, millennials, and the Zoomers who will be forced to pay for their social care.

Swap your summer fling for your winter cuff-up: five things to do before the firebreak lockdown

THE UK’s return to normality is going so well there might be a firebreak lockdown in October. Get these five activities done first.

Everyone under 25 essentially still little children

PEOPLE aged 25 and under are not the adults they believe because they still behave like tiny little children.

How much are you willing to pay to get pissed?

IT'S the debate that divides Britain: do you shell out £40 for a bottle of Grey Goose when Glen's Vodka is £9.48 a litre? If so, why?

Man genuinely weirded out that there's no lockdown coming

A MAN is feeling disquieted and uneasy because not only is he not in lockdown but there is no lockdown approaching.

Ocado reviews, and other places to find the angriest people in the world

LOOKING for an angry bastard? Forget pitchfork-wielding mobs or boxing rings, check out these cesspits of fury instead.