Sport

Playing cricket in England for five days ‘practical joke that went too far’

THE idea of holding a five-day cricket match in England was initially conceived as a prank, it has emerged.

New football season make everything better for man

ALL bad stuff in world gone away now football back, say man.

The best sports for avoiding your family and your problems

EXERCISE is great for your mental wellbeing because you can hide from your family and your problems in a cowardly way. Here are the best sports for avoiding real life.

People who don’t like cricket are wrong, say experts

CRICKET is brilliant and if you disagree you are less than a buffoon, according to experts.

Cricket fans ready to trash Waitrose if England win World Cup

CRICKET fans are threatening to rampage through Waitrose, Cath Kidston and SpaceNK wreaking havoc if England win today’s World Cup.

Is cricket the greatest sport ever or are you just watching it p*ssed?

CRICKET: it dates back to 1598, it goes on for days and despite most of the world having no interest England still never wins.

Woman experiencing unfamiliar sensation of pretending to be proud of team she's really p*ssed off with

A WOMAN is suffering the alien sensation of claiming to be very proud of a national team she is actually very, very angry with.

England women's success 'proof of positive discrimination'

THE England women’s team’s progression to the semi-final is proof that men are the real victims of sexism now, according to idiots.

Premier League fixtures let Man Utd fan know when he'll be angry

THE release of 2019-20’s Premier League fixtures means a Manchester United supporter can diarise when he will be a complete nightmare to be around.

Man expert in women's football after four days' dedicated study

A MALE football fan has read four day’s worth of coverage of the FIFA Women’s World Cup and is now an expert, he has confirmed.

Mum baffled as to why she has to watch so much shit children's sport

A MUM can see no valid reason for spending a huge part of her life watching small children’s totally inconsequential sporting events.

Man who thinks women's football is boring won't shut up about golf

A MAN who claims women’s football is slow and lacking in action also thinks men hitting tiny balls with sticks for hours is utterly fascinating.