Sport
Scotland fans seamlessly switch to supporting England
THE Tartan Army have confirmed that now Scotland have been knocked out of the Euros they will be backing England all the way.
We ask you: which England player should be dropped, tarred, feathered and sent home?
THE England team, favourite to win the tournament, are in fact crap. Which one player is entirely responsible and should be sent home?
Naive 16-year-old fan wondering what's happened to England
AN innocent young England fan who has only known Gareth Southgate as manager is puzzled as to why the team is rubbish all of a sudden.
Fanzone not celebrating England wins by throwing pints because they cost £9.50
ENGLAND fans watching the game in a fanzone today say they will not celebrate goals by flinging their pints in the air because they cost the best part of a f**king tenner.
Triathletes unable to say why
COMPETITORS in punishing triathlons are at a loss to explain why they would ever take part in them, it has emerged.