Science & Technology

Who are you trolling online?

DELIBERATELY angering strangers on the internet is the UK’s top new lockdown hobby. So who are you trolling this weekend?

How to take your mind off current events without ever putting down your phone

GIVING yourself a break from the news is essential for mental health, but reading a book or watching Netflix is too much like not looking at your phone.

However many batteries you bought, it is not enough

YOU thought you were prepared. You thought you had batteries enough for beyond Christmas. But however many you had, it is not enough.

Woman texting

People who chase up a text after five minutes told to get a f**king life

PEOPLE who text you after a few minutes to see why you have not replied to their message should piss off and get a life.

Woman says 'thank you' to automated checkout

A SHOPPER starved of human contact has given her sincere thanks to a checkout machine for scanning her purchases.

Mum doing engineering degree to untwist toddler's seatbelt

A MUM is studying for a four-year engineering degree in the hope she will learn how to untwist her child’s car-seat straps.

New Apple headphones block out people laughing at you

APPLE’S new AirPods Max headphones are capable of blocking out people laughing at you for paying £549 for them, it has emerged.

Five fun facts everyone already f**king knows

DO you like to entertain people with fun but surprising facts that make great talking points? Are they the same facts everyone already f**king knows?

What psychological damage have you suffered from 1980s computer games?

NEW research suggests gaming can improve wellbeing. But today’s games aren’t the maddening frustration-fests of the 1980s. Find out how you’ve been mentally scarred.

Elon Musk invents tiny spaceship that can fly right up his piss hole

SOUTH African Elon Musk has announced that now he has conquered space he has a new project: a spaceship that can fly right up his penis.

Why people are really liking your social media posts

WE all get a buzz when our social media posts get a lot of likes. But don’t get too excited - here are the real reasons people have ‘liked’ your online ramblings.   

Scientist doubting life's work after reading Facebook comments by twat

AN expert epidemiologist is doubting everything he has ever learned about viruses after reading the baseless opinions of some halfwit on Facebook.