Science & Technology

Five fantastic new emojis just for Guardian readers

EXISTING emojis are fine for plebs, but don’t convey the complex feelings of Guardian readers. As Apple launches more than 200 new ones, here are some just for them.

Everyone secretly grateful for complete losers who write Amazon reviews

CONSUMERS agree that people who write product reviews on Amazon are pitiful losers, despite reading every single one and finding them very helpful.

Woman who took quick glance at Instagram looks up and five years have passed

A WOMAN who had a quick one-second peek of Instagram has looked up to find five years of her life have disappeared.

How to follow old school friends on social media without them realising

WANT to snoop on your former schoolmates in a pathetic attempt to feel good about yourself? Here’s how to pry without getting caught.

Five things never to put on social media if you want to keep your job

KEEN to remain in gainful employment? Then don’t livestream yourself marching with a banned far-right group.

How to parallel park, by a man standing on the pavement shouting instructions

YOU can fit it in that gap easy! Yeah, bags of room. Here, you reverse it in and I’ll stand here shouting judgments disguised as help.

The moron's guide to choosing the right comments section

ARE you desperate to share your witless opinions and tired jokes underneath newspaper articles? Here’s how to find the comments section that’s right for you.

Who are you trolling online?

DELIBERATELY angering strangers on the internet is the UK’s top new lockdown hobby. So who are you trolling this weekend?

How to take your mind off current events without ever putting down your phone

GIVING yourself a break from the news is essential for mental health, but reading a book or watching Netflix is too much like not looking at your phone.

However many batteries you bought, it is not enough

YOU thought you were prepared. You thought you had batteries enough for beyond Christmas. But however many you had, it is not enough.