Alcohol

Light, carefree summer drinking gives way to grim, determined winter drinking

THIS weekend marks the official end of Britain’s relaxed, airy summer drinking and the beginning of a hard winter of grim-faced serious drinking.  

Are you drinking enough red wine in the morning?

DRINKING three glasses of red wine a week is good for your health, according to new research. Functioning alcoholic Donna Sheridan gives her misinterpretation:

Bastard orders large glass of wine on your round

A PISS-TAKING bastard of a mate will always order a large glass of white wine when it is your turn to get a round in, he has confirmed.

Five disturbingly mental conversations to overhear in your local pub

POPPING the local for one? Prepared to overhear the most appallingly lunatic conversations ever?

The six stages of a hangover that's still going strong at 6pm

SOME hangovers don't fade away by the end of Lorraine, or lunchtime, or even early evening. Here's how they progress:

Five hideous alcoholic concoctions you drank to get wankered in the 90s

FROM Special Brew to snakebite, you drank some truly awful shit just to get drunk as fast as possible in the 90s. Here are the dated drinks that will make you heave now.

Six bullshit things to blame for your hangover

HANGOVER causes range from drinking too much to drinking far too much. So why not try these bullshit excuses instead?

How to safely binge-drink through a heatwave

THE only way to survive this terrible heat is to be too pissed to care. Here’s how to get through the hottest week of the year hammered.

A farewell love letter to table service in pubs

REST in peace, mandatory table service in pubs. Your valiant service will be remembered long after Freedom Day.

Teenagers to hold their own prom by getting pissed in field

SCHOOL-LEAVERS disappointed their prom has been cancelled are to hold their own by getting hammered on cider in a field.