Lifestyle

A MAN openly smoking crack on the London Underground has made the news. It’s already known for its nutters, gangs and perverts, so how should you annoy and horrify passengers in your own inimitable way?

I GET it. Women on apps expect a man of my age to have settled down. The ones aged 24 to 29 anyway. I don’t know what ones over 30 would say. They’re not in my Tinder age range

MOVING house is widely acknowledged as the only way to live in a different house, but is it worth it? Or should you slump on the sofa looking as a wall you hate forever?

DO you live many, many miles from the sea, but still have a boat in your drive as if it were a short hop away? Go through our checklist.

A MAN who believes the spring weather gives him licence to wear a Hawaiian shirt has been sternly corrected.

A MAN has reached a key milestone in his journey towards respectable old age by getting through seven days and nights without shooting his load.

BRITAIN’S men are in agreement that chilling on the sofa, in the pub or in the shed is up there with hiking or windsurfing as an activity.

ORGANISING a hen weekend has forced a woman to become everything she has always despised.

A HUGE influx of tourists to the Cotswolds is only there because making the people who live in its villages miserable is such tremendous fun.

WHEN my wife insisted on buying an electric car I said 'yes'. Not because I’m an emasculated cuck, though. Because bothering to argue with a woman is what a Beta would do.