Lifestyle

ARE you a grump for suspecting your message will be ignored as you press ‘send’? No, because you’re contacting one of these feckless bastards.

A MAN is stunned to discover that his friends are at an age where they are actively having children on purpose, it has emerged.

A WOMAN has admitted giving her pet dog a weekly allowance so he can get himself little treats if he want to.

A BALD man has admitted that, though nobody would ever suspect it, he would actually prefer to have hair.

CHILDREN say the cruelest, funniest things, directly to you in front of a roomful of people, like ‘Where’s your hair gone, uncle Simon?’ Here’s how to laugh it off.

YOUR friend remembers that you used to have long greasy hair and listened to Ned’s Atomic Dustbin and has the photos to prove it.

A BRITISH man has once again been f**ked over by Google’s assertion that Mother’s Day falls in May.

WANKING is the best human experience possible, but did you know it feels even better in a hotel room? Here's why.

WANT to really get on a taxi driver’s tits during the short journey from the pub to your house? Try these techniques: