Woman desperately hoping romantic weekend away won't end in awkward marriage proposal

A WOMAN going on a romantic weekend with her boyfriend is praying he is not planning to ask her to marry him.

When Mummy gets a bun in the Aga: the middle-class guide to 'the talk'

EXPLAINING sex to your children is never easy, especially when your home’s over the threshold for inheritance tax. Sex expert Denys Finch Hatton tells you how.

Dad getting drunk for Father’s Day

A FATHER-OF-TWO has decided to celebrate Father’s Day by drinking from lunchtime onwards, he has confirmed.

Couple glad they've got four more weeks of lockdown to blame relationship on

A COUPLE are glad to have a further four weeks blaming lockdown for the state of their relationship before facing the facts.

'Men are intimidated by you', and other lies to tell your perpetually single female friend

FRIENDS with a fundamentally undateable woman? Reassure her that it’s not her fault even though it is with these lies.

Five sexual fantasies that would be mortifying to actually go through with

Got some sexual fantasies to tick off your bucket list? These should never become a reality because they’d be an excruciating let down.

The One Show: The worst TV programmes to try to initiate sex during

HAVING sex is usually better than watching the telly. However certain programmes are not conducive to putting the moves on your partner...

A man's options when a woman says 'It's nothing'

A MAN instinctively knows when a woman says ‘It’s nothing’, she means ‘It’s something’. But what really matters is the response that follows.

Enchanted woodland on midsummer's eve, and other wedding themes for simpering twats

GETTING married? Consumed with making your wedding stand out from all the others? These wedding themes will show everyone the real arsehole you.

Man doesn't realise he is a practise date

A MAN who is his partner’s first date since lockdown began has no idea that the date does not count because it is just for practise.