A COUPLE have agreed they are not really the type to have sex dangerous or boundary-crossing enough to need a safeword, and feel the lesser for it.
Ryan Whittaker and Grace Wood-Morris have faced facts and ruefully agreed that since they do not like hurting each other or pretending to, they will never need the verbal emergency stop button that other, sexier couples rely upon.
Grace said: “I’m not really up for being whipped, spanked or slapped. Like the basic normcore bitch I am, I associate those acts with pain.
“Sex for me is about pleasure, and rather than safewords I employ phrases like ‘just there’ and ‘yes that’s good’ rather than having to call out ‘loganberry’ when he get carried away. Our love life peaks at a tepid room-temperature. I’ve come to terms with that.”
Whittaker agreed: “I don’t want to choke Grace. It would make me feel like a murderer which is not a way I want to feel when I’m naked with an erection.
“It’s crushing, admitting our lovemaking is boring, regional and focused on intimacy when it could be so much more risky and thrilling. But we basically like missionary and bringing each other to satisfying orgasms. I know.”
Grace’s mother Janet said: “They should still establish a safeword. I wouldn’t be without mine, which I use to avoid sex altogether.”
