You are never more than six feet away from a Dave


    YOU are never more than six feet away from a bloke called Dave, researchers have discovered.

    The Institute for Studies found that that every single person in the UK knows at least seven Daves at any given time and the Daves are now spread evenly across the entire country.

    Professor Henry Brubaker said: “Traditionally, Daves were largely confined to pubs, snooker halls or at the ‘footy’ with the ‘Garys’ and ‘Ians’, but in recent years they have taken over offices and the gym.

    “There’s probably at least one Dave under your desk at work. Meanwhile, always remember to check your shed and the boot of your car for Daves.

    “There may even be a medium-sized Dave in your attic.”

    He added: “We think Britain is now approaching peak-Dave as we have yet to find a Dave under the age of 10.”