Self-portraits ‘fuelling narcissism’

SELF-PORTRAITS by artists including Rembrandt and Van Gogh are to be banned from the National Gallery for encouraging mindless vanity. 

The move follows concern that artists over the centuries have been over-obsessed with their own mugging, pouting faces rather than engaging with reality.

Helen Archer, curator of the National Gallery said: “Artists like Van Gogh kept painting their own heads, rather than important things like vases or urinals. It’s pretty annoying when you think about it.

“I blame technology. They should never have invented the mirror.”

The estate of Rembrandt Van Rijn has apologised for the number of selfies bequeathed by the old master. 

Curator Tom Booker said: “For every memorable picture of the Treasurer of the Dutch West India Company, there’s ten of Rembrandt grinning from the canvas. Who cares?

“We burned most of them but there are still a few left, I’m afraid.”