By Joseph and Kate Turner of Nottingham
AS a couple, we wondered if there could be something more to our hollow lives. So we tried buying everything we wanted all the time, and it’s been brilliant.
We were inspired by a friend of ours, who spent a full year without spending anything and was always boasting of how blissful it was while reeking of cheap Jojoba shampoo from the cash-and-carry. What if she’s wrong? we thought.
So, on October 12th last year, we began our bold experiment. We vowed we would buy whatever we wanted, no matter how impulsive or wasteful. We would give in to any consumerist impulse. And 12 months later our house is just teeming with stuff.
Designer clothes, pizza ovens, gaming laptops – we bought it all. We bought furniture we don’t have room for. I paid £2,500 for a ride-on mower even though we only have a small back garden and it’s paved. But you know what? It makes me happy to see it sit there gleaming.
Nights out? We’ve seen opera at Covent Garden, shows in the West End, Bruno Mars at Wembley Stadium and a man swallowing eels for money in the back room of a Dagenham pub. And every single one of them was better than a night in playing Uno.
We can barely get around our own home, so full is it of Linn hi-fi equipment, Stöckli skis, Scubapro oxygen tanks and discarded Louboutins. And it feels bloody great. So what if we never use it? It’s still ours and you’re jealous.
How did we afford it? Well, I had a small bequest from an aunt, we refinanced the house and we sold anything that bored us. You’ll be amazed how much you can get for an in-box Omega Speedmaster Moonwatch Professional you didn’t like the colour of.
So if you’ve ever wondered ‘Am I spending enough? Do I really want all these things? Is it just marketing?’ the answers are no, yes, and no respectively.
Now if you’ll forgive me, I’ve got a £2,500 Givenchy mohair blazer to try on, say ‘nah’ and discard carelessly onto an Eames chair. What heaven it is to be alive.
