Friday, 22nd January 2021

Girlfriend's cupboard space now 90 per cent flavoured teas

A BOYFRIEND has been shocked to discover his girlfriend has obsessively filled her cupboard space with an array of bizarrely flavoured teas.

After finding her large stash of herbal and fruit teas with twee names, Lauren Hewitt’s boyfriend Tom Logan now fears she has an addiction problem.

Logan said: “I was looking to see if she had any biscuits hidden away, and when I opened her cupboard it was like staring into the stockroom of Holland & Barrett.

“I knew her obsession with mad teas had been snowballing recently, but I should’ve realised how bad it had got. 

“Hibiscus, blackcurrant and camomile, refreshing lemon, ginseng and orange, ‘Fruitalicious mango with pomegranate’ – it’s no wonder the kitchen always smells like someone dropped a bath bomb into a mug.

“There’s barely any room for food in there. She’s a junkie, basically. I’m worried I’ll come home one day and find her face down in a mound of rooibos loose leaf like Tony Montana.”

Hewitt said: “I haven’t got a problem. I could stop and drink PG Tips any time. Anyway you should see the number of stupid craft beers he hoards in the shed.”