FAMILIES have infested every part of society and are constantly in your way thanks to half term, it has emerged.
Roads, supermarkets, parks and cafes are all teeming with exhausted parents and their school-age children this week, as they desperately try to keep themselves entertained during the half term holiday.
Nathan Muir from Coventry said: “Time was you could easily avoid families if you steered clear of the school run and gave soft play areas a wide berth. God how I miss those wonderful, carefree days.
“Now you’ve got to elbow your way past throngs of mums and dads and their shrieking spawn the second you leave the front door. They’re getting out of hand and the government should do something about it. Maybe a cull, like badgers?
“I can understand families popping along to National Trust properties, which gives me another reason not to visit them. But the pub? B&M at lunchtime? Those places are the refuge of single, childless loners and that should be respected.
“Where next? Will I get home to my grim singleton flat, only to find a family playing kids’ games on my laptop when I want to look up hardcore porn? There’s a community farm less than a mile away, the inconsiderate bastards.”
Mum-of-two Donna Sheridan said: “I’ve just heard there’s a hill in Snowdonia that hasn’t been crowded out with annoying families, so we’re on our way now to ruin it for everyone.”
