Woman believes in life after death but not in a ridiculous Christian way

A WOMAN is convinced there is life after death but without the unfashionable Christian elements, she has revealed.

Office worker Nikki Hollis believes her vague notion of consciousness living on ‘somehow’ is more plausible than a traditional God-based heaven of the type her nan believes in.

Hollis said: “Heaven and angels are obviously bollocks, but I don’t like the idea of being dead. It makes all the things you’ve done in your life seem pointless – watching a beautiful sunset, falling in love, revising for your GCSEs.

“Although I’m not religious I do have my own belief system which is based on yoga, emotions and looking at pictures of dolphins on the internet.

“Therefore I prefer to believe that when you die your spirit – or whatever – leaves your body and floats around the cosmos forever, as a form of ‘energy’. I think energy is a good word because it sounds like science.

“I think the afterlife looks like a nice farmhouse in Tuscany, like in a yoghurt advert.

“It’s something to look forward to, unless I do a murder in which case my spirit will of course have to haunt graveyards scaring teenagers.”