Gemini (21 MAY-20 JUN)
Something seems a little odd about the new person who's been flirting with you. At first meeting they don’t appear to be a deranged bunny boiler. Multiple personalities?
Cancer (21 JUN-22 JUL)
Get the facts before you overreact. And then overreact
Leo (23 JUL-22 AUG)
Are all your friends calling and asking where you've been this past few weeks? Thought not.
Virgo (23 AUG-22 SEP)
After weeks of intense late night conversations, you're finally going to meet that girl you've been chatting to online. Now, how are you going to make yourself look 15?
Libra (23 SEP-23 OCT)
Your friends want to know where you get all your energy, and if you can share some with them. Tell them to get their own, it’s £40 a gramme!
Scorpio (24 OCT-21 NOV)
A person from your romantic past shows up and causes you to think about some old tissues.
Sagittarius (22 NOV-21 DEC)
Avoiding the easy option all the time takes discipline, and you don’t have any. But your sister’s husband? At their anniversary party? You should be grateful you don’t remember!
Capricorn (22 DEC-19 JAN)
It's one of those days. You just want to be at your desk with the door shut. If others think you're a workaholic, then let them. They got the ‘aholic’ bit right anyway.
Aquarius (20 JAN-19 FEB)
Everything seemed like it was going so well, but now you're wondering what the hell is going on. Sometimes there are no easy answers. Was that helpful?
Pisces (20 FEB-20 MAR)
It's time to take a cold hard look at your finances, fake your own death and move to Venezuela.
Aries (21 MAR-19 APR)
Inspiration will strike you at the strangest time today. Don’t forget to wipe your arse!