Which dreadful personality type are you?

Are you obsessed with knowing what your personality type is and then telling people about it? You probably come under the category of ‘self-absorbed arse’. But what are the five other main personality types?

Do you have a chip on your shoulder the size of Leeds? Do you feel superior to everyone else because you were born quite near Leeds? You have a deeply entrenched ‘Northern’ personality that will only get worse as you age. Thanks for that.

Do you have unwarranted self-confidence? A passion for animals, apart from the ones you kill? Do you call your evening meal ‘supper’, even though that actually means cheese on toast at around 9pm? You also wear a pink shirt with the collar turned up, don’t you? Everyone, including you, wants you to pack it in.

Incredibly dull
Did you know that 92.6% of the population have a mind-numbingly dull personality type? If you found that interesting, then you’re one of them. Also, you’re really into Peaky Blinders.

Can’t-quite-put-your-finger-on-it weird
You are subtly odd, but other people aren’t quite sure why. Are you just a harmless introvert with a secret collection of lizards? Or are you a serial pervert? Nobody wants to find out – except, perhaps, the police.

A fucker
Do you let your kids act like little bastards in public places? Do you constantly quote Monty Python and the Holy Grail? Do you own an Audi TT? Do you have conversations about supermarkets? You are a fucker.

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GDPR emails told to chill the f**k out

DESPERATE GDPR emails telling people ‘their time is up’ and ‘they must take action now’ have been told to calm the fuck down.

Gary Booker from London said: “At first I was quite chuffed that these guys really wanted to ‘keep in touch’ with me but then it all got a bit weird.

“I have been told I was going to miss out, my time is running out, I will never be contacted again and that this was my last chance.

“Then they sent a photo of me in the shower this morning.”

He added: “They need to accept that if I want to read their privacy policy wank-fest, I will do it in my own time. But I probably won’t because I don’t actually give a shit.

“It’s like having an annoying girlfriend who keeps texting you with ‘?’ or ‘are you there, hun?’ until you reply.”