BBC Four to show Norwegian Crimewatch

Show consists of bleak reconstructions, emotionally detached detectives solving crimes at great personal cost, 15-minute long intervals of meditative silence and phone number at bottom of screen.


Sign up now to get
The Daily Mash
free Headlines email – every weekday

Cameron and Salmond unveil independence double-bluff masterpiece

Standing ovation as Cameron alienates Scots by dictating terms of referendum, Salmond pretends he is angry about it and Cameron pretends he would hate having a permanent majority in an English parliament.