A MAN has complained about his inability to lose weight, midway through his 15th pint of the week.
Health fanatic Martin Bishop, 30, said “No matter what type of diet or exercise I follow, I never seem to be able to lose those few extra pounds”, before pausing to take another sip.
“In particular I can’t seem to shift this portly belly that just sort of juts out like a miserable pregnancy.
“It can’t be my diet. I always choose whatever the healthiest thing is on the pub menu.”
He added: “I guess it’s just a genetic thing, my Dad had the same problem with his weight. Or maybe society just needs to accept this is who I am and that my body shape is as valid as – sorry yes, another IPA please – as anyone else’s.
“I’m going to start some sort of campaign.”