Friday, 28th February 2020

Lads' holiday booked on afternoon flight forced to sink pints at 2pm like tw*ts

A GROUP of lads are flying to Ibiza so late that they are lining up at the bar and sinking pints at a perfectly acceptable hour to do so. 

The men, aged between 19 and 26, are bitterly ashamed to be seen drinking so heavily in the airport when there is nothing unusual about it and claim their 4.40pm flight has ruined their holiday.

Apprentice plumber Nathan Muir said: “I’ve got three lagers lined up, the afternoon sun’s slanting through the glass and nobody’s paying me the slightest bit of attention. Bollocks to this.

“When we say the airport beers are the best bit of the holiday, we’re not f**king around. Six beers at 7am while other passengers pretend not to hear our ‘lads on tour’ chant? Bliss mate.

“It’s thrilling to drink in the morning. It’s statement drinking. Instead we’re sat like a bunch of old blokes in a Wetherspoons on a Tuesday afternoon. It’s depressing.

“When’s the flight back? After-bloody-noon? Right lads, we’re going to have to arrive at the airport eight hours early. This is a matter of pride.”