Andrew Lloyd Webber pens musical about what a twat he is

ANDREW Lloyd Webber’s new musical will tell the story of a billionaire who flies across an ocean to stop poor people getting tax credits.

Following the composer’s shows about misunderstood political figures Eva Peron, Jesus Christ and Bustopher Jones the Cat About Town, Wings of a Lord will follow his dramatic mission from New York to London to vote for government cuts.

In the story, democracy is overthrown by the grey-skinned Corbynites and Lloyd Webber is forced to lead a millionaire revolution. It ends with him standing with bra-clad heroine Michelle Mone in the blackened remains of London, Conservatism having prevailed.

Director Julian Cook said: “There’s a cast of thousands, mainly ragged beggars scuttling just out of the spotlight, and the three disciplines of dance, song and performance really create a vivid impression of what a painstakingly thorough twat Andrew Lloyd Webber really is.

“Sorry, I meant Baron Lloyd-Webber.”