BBC announces ‘ultimate programme’ about cakes having angry sex

A NEW BBC series about delicious cakes having angry sex with each other has been hailed as the ultimate televised entertainment.

Doctor Baker: Cakes and Shagging is a new cake-based drama about a professional, attractive sponge cake called Judy who is happily married to a freshly-baked apple pie called Gerald that runs its own legal company.

But their aspirational lifestyle falls apart when Gerald the pie comes home covered in cream, possibly from getting off with a slutty Greggs custard slice that lives on a council estate.

A BBC spokesman said: “Imagine you’re got the seemingly perfect partner, a big house and a fancy sports type car, and you’re a delicious cake.

“Then some other cake comes along, a massive oblong of fake custard who’s way below your cake income bracket, and temptation gives way to angry cakes having a cake shag.

“If you don’t want to watch this you don’t deserve to have eyes.”