Breaking Bad makers admit final episode never going to happen

VINCE Gilligan has cancelled the final episode of Breaking Bad after running out of ideas.

Series creator Gilligan said the show’s concluding episode would be postponed indefinitely after he and his team hit a creative brick wall.

Although they had been confidently pretending that the last episode had been completed and was ‘intense’, the writing team never got beyond writing ‘Walt’ and ‘Jesse’ on a flip chart.

Gilligan said: “We’ve got nothing. Nothing. I’m very sorry.

“We kind of assumed it would get cancelled after two seasons, if we were lucky. So we never really planned ahead, the plot just grew organically, like a wild shrub.

“I had a vague thought involving a machine gun but that didn’t work out, for various reasons I can’t be bothered to go into.

“The we asked everyone working on the show to write an idea on a Post-It note but they came out with stuff like ‘Skyler gets eaten by a wolf’, ‘Walt’s not ill, he’s pregnant’, and ‘Everyone sorts it out over a nice hot drink’.”

He continued: “Even writing a single episode is incredibly draining. There’s all these characters running around doing different things, it’s like maths.

“Now we’ve missed the deadline and they’re going to put an old episode of The A-Team on in our time slot.

“The good news though is that it’s the one where they get trapped in a warehouse and fight back with modified toy planes. Probably the best A-Team ever made.”

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Channel 4 to show healthy lovemaking in natural cube environment

CONTROVERSY-FRIENDLY broadcaster Channel 4’s new series is to show normal, healthy lovemaking in a giant cube.

The producer of Sex Box said: “Pornography has made sex seem somehow dirty or titillating.

“But what could be more natural and healthy than two people having sexual intercourse in a cube?”

36-year-old Tom Booker said: “My personal interest in the reproductive act is purely scientific. Thus far my research has focused mainly on the topic of ‘big naturals’.”