A NEW film of Freddie Mercurys life story will portray the rocker as straight.
Biopic Freddie: Rockin’ for Vagina portrays the singer as an average ‘lad’ who liked beer, birds and tinkering under the bonnet of his Ford Escort. Film industry sources are tipping either Jason Statham or Idris Elba for the title role.
Producer Stephen Malley said: The fact is that many people would prefer it if Freddie hadnt been gay.
Our Freddie is very much the sort of bloke youd find down the pub, chatting up the ladies and discussing Millwalls chances this season.
“He still does everything Freddie did, writing Bohemian Rhapsody and that incredible Live Aid performance, but he does it without showing any interest in mens arses.
Obviously Freddies death from AIDS-related illness presents a problem, but weve invented a new ailment for him to die from, rockstaritis, a fatal disease caused by being too famous.”
Malley plans to replace elements of Mercurys life, such as his long-term male lover, visits to gay clubs and numerous public statements confirming he was gay, with a storyline about him missing his wife and children while on tour.
Mother-of-two Carolyn Ryan said: Its great to see someone setting the record straight. I love Queen but I dont like gays, so theres no way Freddie could have been gay.
Also if he was gay, how come he sang Fat Bottomed Girls and not Fat Bottomed Men? That just wouldnt make sense.