Heroes of 'young adult' novels more special than everyone else

THE heroes of teenage fiction are all far superior to the dull contemporaries who pick on them, it has been confirmed.

Researchers found ‘young adult’ novels invariably focus on a teenage boy or girl who is different and isolated from their peers but soon proves they’re actually way better and that shows them.

Teenager Eleanor Shaw said: “I really identified with the Divergent novels, in which a girl discovers that not fitting in with the other kids is actually her superpower so everyone should shut up and listen to her.

“I’m not popular with my peers either, for the same basic reason – that I am amazing and they are not.

“Probably I am from space or the future, or am a ghost.”

Literature professor Emma Bradford said: “It’s easy to see why teenagers love books where the hero breaks all the adults’ rules and brings their stupid world crashing to the ground.

“But remember, Harry Potter was the special saviour of the world and he ended up as a middle manager in the Ministry of Magic with three kids.”

17-year-old Nikki Hollis said: “These books understand us. It’s like my friend Susie, who was going out with a smackhead biker in his 40s, really identified with the Twilight novels about an abusive relationship with an addicted nocturnal older guy that turns out to be totally true love.

“It was just like Bella and Edward until she got sent to prison.”

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New Game of Thrones is just everyone introducing themselves

FANTASY series Game of Thrones is to return with an hour-long episode in which all the characters introduce themselves to camera.

The season opener, which contains no action at all, shows each of the 214 main characters giving their name, family connections, and recent history and motivations at length.

Producer Julian Cook said: “It was going to be one of those two-minute ‘previously on Game of Thrones‘ things, but then it stretched to 30 minutes, then a full hour.

“And it proved so useful for the actors, who haven’t got a clue what’s happening half the time.

“We’re sure everyone will particularly enjoy their five minutes with Hodor.”

Viewers are encouraged to take notes and to put a map on their wall with pins showing where everyone is and threads showing where they’re going, like they’re homicide cops.

Stephen Malley of Luton said: “I’m a busy man who watches loads of telly, and frankly all I can remember from the last series is someone’s pecker getting cut off.

“This will be invaluable, and if the characters could start wearing coloured hats to indicate who’s a goodie or baddie that would be even better.”

However, preview audience member Wayne Hayes disagreed: “I didn’t see one pair of exposed breasts the entire episode. What do they think I put up with all that Vale of Arryn bullshit for?”