Injunction stops 'Indiana Jones and the Nazi Buddha Statue'

A COURT injunction has banned Steven Spielberg and George Lucas from even thinking about making Indiana Jones and the Nazi Buddha Statue from Space.

As reports emerged of a Tibetan Buddha sculpture carved from a meteorite and pillaged by Nazis, lawyers representing everyone in the world immediately applied for a court order to prevent another offensive catastrophe.

Julian Cook, a film injunction specialist at Porter, Pinkney and Turner, said: “The statue even has a little swastika on it that would no doubt be erased by a supernatural power to the strains of some spooky John Williams music.

“As well as the injunction we have asked for the statue to be destroyed and have appealed to every news outlet in the world to remove all traces of the story from their archives.

“Never again.”

 

 

Sign up now to get
The Daily Mash
free Headlines email – every weekday
privacy

Ponds 'die in hot Tardis'

DOCTOR Who assistants Amy and Rory Pond are to die after being left locked in a poorly-ventilated Tardis.

The intrepid companions will be seen expiring this weekend after the Doctor ‘nips out to get some fags’.

But it is a hot, sunny day outside on the planet Zartan and the the Time Lord forgets to wind down the windows on the Tardis.

Show runner Stephen Moffatt said: “It’s a sad, cautionary tale. And so sadly ironic, of course, given their aquatic surname.”