Man decides first 10 minutes of new Adam Curtis film should be enough to bluff it

A MAN who saw the first 10 minutes of Adam Curtis’s new documentary is to pretend he watched the whole thing.

Tom Logan thought he would enjoy Hypernormalisation after hearing positive reviews from people but he quickly found the subject matter a little bit heavy and quite confusing.

Logan said: “If anyone in the pub mentions it I’ll just say the stuff about Trump at the beginning was really fascinating and that I loved all the weird stock footage of stuff and the lovely, warm voice over.

I’m sure if I’d have stuck with it I’d have definitely understood it, but it’s also nearly three hours long and Vin Diesel isn’t in it.

Whose got that much time on their hands to watch a documentary? Especially as I still haven’t yet gotten round to watching all six series of American Horror Story.”

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Homeless man looking a bit down today for some reason

A HOMELESS man who is usually upbeat seems a bit down today and no one’s quite sure why.

Bill McKay, 56, usually sings Born in the USA while greeting passers-by but locals claim he doesn’t quite seem his usual jolly self.

Local Barista, Julian Cook said, “He’s usually so full of life. Dancing about the place, proposing to every girl who walks past him and then laughing when they walk off. But today he’s just sat there looking bloody depressed.

“I wonder why he’s in such a mood?

Usually I’d give him a cup of coffee and a bit of cake for being so entertaining but if he’s going to just sit there looking like he wants to cry then he can sod off.”

When asked why he was so down, McKay simply shook his head, muttered something about the government and then looked off down the street with a heavy sigh.

Cook added: “See. What’s funny about that?”