Wednesday, 19th February 2020

Well they've f**ked that right up, says George RR Martin

GAME of Thrones author George RR Martin has confirmed that the latest episode of the TV adaptation has buggered it completely. 

Martin, whose middle initials are a tribute to Countdown’s Rachel Riley, admitted it was his own fault for not finishing the books in time but never imagined they would get the show this wrong.

He said: “What the fuck did they do that for? They’ve got three episodes left.

“No spoilers obviously, but I envisaged that particular conflict not being resolved until the very end. Being as it’s what the whole thing was clearly about from the start.

“Have they just got that bit over with quickly so they can go off in their own direction? Is Jon Snow going to form a jazz quintet now? Are the next three hours going to return to the core values of the show and be entirely tits?

“I can’t wait for everyone to read the books, where I do all this properly and don’t just curtail it early because there isn’t the budget and pretend it’s a shocking twist.

“Then again, I don’t know if I can be arsed finishing writing them now they’ve ruined it. Just imagine it for yourselves.”