Thursday, 13th May 2021

Ryanair 'a totally acceptable casualty of Brexit'

MOST people would be prepared to live in abject poverty if it was guaranteed that Ryanair would go down with them, it has emerged.

With bosses voicing concerns about the impact of a no deal Brexit on the airline, the public say they are fully prepared to crash out of the EU if it means they never have to look at Ryanair’s vile yellow and blue livery ever again.

IT consultant Stephen Malley said: “I travel to Europe a lot for work, so Brexit is going to make my job either a total nightmare or non-existent. However, I will live in a hut and eat grass with pleasure if it also stops Ryanair from being inflicted on humanity.

“I’d be happy for an ‘affordable holiday’ to mean a trip to scavenge in the bins of a slightly further away branch of Tesco after Brexit happens if that fucking bugle sound they play every time a plane lands is silenced forever.

“And if it means I never again have to travel with a stranger basically sitting on my knee because we’ve been crammed in like cattle then I am all for it.

“A no-deal Brexit will be comfortable and convenient by comparison.”