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Trampolines magnificent in flight, agrees Britain

THERE are few sights more majestic to behold than the humble trampoline swooping and soaring high overhead, Britain has agreed. 

The domestic trampoline spends much of its time roosting in suburban gardens before taking to the skies during storms and entertaining thousands with amazing aerial acrobatics.

Wayne Hayes of Exeter said: “You wouldn’t think they’re that impressive when you see them from a passing train. But once they’re in the air, these trampolines put the Red Arrows to shame.

“Dives, barrel rolls, loop-the-loops, last night I saw them do the lot. Their sheer joy at finally being untethered is exhilarating to see. Lifts the spirit. I went in and gave the wife one.”

Lucy Parry of Annan said: “It’s wonderful to see them set free and flying around in what must be their natural habitat. I presume they’re migrating to a more hospitable climate.

“A whole flock winged their way over my house last night like a murmuration of starlings. I guess they do that to fend off predators. It was so beautiful I jotted down a few lines of poetry to send to the Dumfries Courier.

“They’re not so great on landings, though. Crashing 40 feet onto my neighbour’s fence ruined the spectacle somewhat.”