BRITAIN’S men never really got over Gillian Anderson, it has emerged.
The timeless beauty has once again provoked widespread emotional incontinence among men who really thought they had moved on.
Sales manager Tom Logan said: “I’d thought about her less and less over the years. Just odd flashes of me and Gillian enjoying a romantic al fresco meal during an African safari trip that never happened.
“She’d retired from TV and made a film with Danny Dyer where she got her tits out, I got married and had two kids.
“But now’s she’s back in my life, looking better than ever, oozing mature sexual confidence. Deep in my heart I know it could still work between us. I am so conflicted.”
40-year-old engineer Stephen Malley said: “I spoke to Gillian last night and she wants to meet up for a drink and some intermediate petting. The fact that this conversation took place in my dream only proves the power of the psychic link we share.
“We’ve got so much in common. For example, we’re both keen on UFOs. Also she’s passionate about making television and I’m passionate about watching it.”