PUBLIC health officials have advised the public to stop eating chicken while pecking the microphone and squawking intermittently.
Up to 78 per cent of chickens sold in supermarkets are contaminated with campylobacter, according to inspectors who bobbed their heads forward while walking and left feathers everywhere.
Food Standard Agency official Roy Hobbs said: “Chickens are dirty bastards.
“Stop eating them immediately, but continue to feed them and house them so they don’t contaminate animals in the wild like foxes, which they should be kept well away from because of the food chain.
“Maybe start to think of them as more of a pet that you spoil with nice treats, and start eating those big hairy things we don’t like instead.
“What are they called? Dogs? Yeah, dogs. We knew that, because we’re people.”
