Cameron excluded from cool G7 clique

THE most popular and good-looking leaders have formed a clique at the G7 summit without David Cameron.

The clique members, led by Barack Obama and Angela Merkel, always sit together at banquets and do cool, fun things without telling the other leaders.

The prime minister said: “They all went to a bierkeller and I had to stay in the hotel playing cards. Then I watched some weird German pornography and went to bed.”

He added: “If you’re only friends with world leaders who are ‘cool’ that makes you a really shallow person. Michael Gove told me that.”

President Obama said: “I kinda like David Cameron, but I’ve got a rep to maintain which means I can’t hang around with British people.”

Last night Cameron announced he was setting up his own G7 clique, but so far it is just him and a confused Japanese tourist.